Welcome to Romance and Relationship

This blog is where we talk about romance and relationships.

We can talk about relationships in general or interracial relationships. My main focus is on interracial relationships.

I hope to make this a site for people to come and get advice, share stories and so on.

Feel free to leave comments on my blog and how I might make it better.

Thanks for visiting Have a great day and God Bless

from movie "Something New"

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Just a few Words

This topic is close to my heart. I have been in more long distance relationships then close, and let me tell you it is not easy. Recently My Queen and I have been in a 3000 mile relationship, which we have been in for over a year. In many ways log distance romances are incredibly hard. To make it work both people need to encourage each other and to be there for each other far more then if they were close to each other. In a close relationship you can hold your partner and tell them everything is going to be all right. But in a long distance you have to think out side the box and give encouragement in different ways. Sending flowers is good but it only helps a little, spending a lot of time listening to each other is very helpful, especially if you are giving encouragement with every talk. Being able to webcam is very effective. But how does one deal with the hold me impulse. All one can do is endure it, find a pillow or item your partner gave you and squeeze it. Dealing with long distance is not easy. You have to take everything day to day and endure the distance and time. Make time to spend with your loved one and still deal with life around you.
A typical day for me is waking up calling My Queen, then praying, then working around the house till My Queen calls me from her work, then work on some small projects, until My Queen calls me again before she goes to class, then I just relax a bit, rest and do what ever until My Queen calls me when she is out of class. At the end of the day I have spent most of the time on the phone with My Queen. This lets her know I am interested in her life and happenings that I am willing to put everything on hold. When I am at work I do my job but I still try and give as much time to her as possible. Many times we both get busy and have to forgo a day or so till we can reconnect. Telling everything about your day helps the relationship grow stronger and even builds trust. When we treat every talk like a date it helps to further the relationship but it still takes doing things a day at a time. Hardships arise when your in a long distance relationship that many times you can’t control. Many fears, many worries. But if both of you work and endure the time the rewards of building that relationship long distance will show in your close one. I am soon moving to Florida I will be there around or before March 13th. When I get to Florida I am looking forward to building on the ground work we have and expanding My Queen and my relationship to new highs neither of us have ever had. We will adapt from long distance to close distance and grow because of it. If you can endure a long distance relationship dealing with the loneliness, the want, the desire, and all of the emotions that run rapid over you. Then being close will be different but easier. Planning dates will be an adventure and will allow you to learn more about each other and of the area. Working and finding time to get together will be a challenge because you will want to spend all of your time with your partner. Calling is still going to happen but you may talk for only a few minuets rather then five hours. Just to set up a date or time to see one another. Basically what I am saying is that no matter what relationship you’re in you have to encourage each other and think out side the box and the transitions from one stage of your relationship to another should be seen as a building of your relationship. Every one goes through hardships but enduring them has greater rewards then just starting over or giving up. when your in a long distance relationship you have to look past the physical and look at the heart of the person. This is what should take place in what ever relationship you are in. take each day as a gift and look at the heart of the people you interact with. Some may repulse you others may attract you but if you are only looking at the physical then you will miss out on a whole lot more.
May God Bless You and Yours.
Ken

I am going to be off line for a while because of the move. When I get internet back I will post again. In the mean time I hope you all grow in your relationships and find the one Go has for you. God Bless

3 comments:

Interracial Veteran said...

Ken,

Thanks for creating and keeping this blog updated about your long distance relationship with your Black Queen. And also thanks for sharing so much of yourself throughout the process.

Your blog is encouraging to all who are open to and considering a long distance interracial relationship.

eula_w said...

Being in a long distance relationship is really hard. But as long as you have a good communication, you can always make stick to each other. :)

human pheromones

Robert German said...

congratulations guys, quality information you have given!!! Discover Green and Gold Gala